Humor: Holy donkey Eddie Murphy gets the last laugh

Holy donkey Eddie Murphy gets the last laugh

I had just got over the shock of seeing Eddie Murphy depicted in a nativity display at my local shopping centre when I found out that the price of my weekly lottery ticket has gone up 20c.

"What is the world coming to?" I wanted to scream at the ticket counter.

I did not, but only because I was with a close friend I did not want to embarrass.

They also know me well in that shop.

I have been buying my lottery ticket at the same place using the same numbers for years. I cannot tell you what the numbers are for fear that I will have to share a big win with every one of my readers, but the shop knows them. They have me and my numbers on their computer, and the attendants know me by sight.

"Look, here comes John the loser," I am sure they whisper every Monday when I enter the shop. "He ALWAYS buys a ticket but he NEVER, EVER wins."

Actually, this is not strictly true. I have won some lower division prizes over the years - $6.60, $12.30, $8.20 etc - but never, ever the big one.

I do live in hope though, especially leading into Christmas.

It is my favourite time of the year.

It is time for joy and goodwill and optimism.

I love seeing the happy children sitting on Santa's knee at the shopping centre. The smiles, the giggles, the white lies about being good for the a whole year. It is such an exciting event for them.

I love seeing the Christmas trees and bunting in the hallways, too, and hearing the Christmas carols piped into the centre.

The shop windows are stacked with all kinds of Christmas fare - puddings, cakes, mince pies, presents - which I love.

Oh, and I LOVE poring over the nativity scene models, with the baby Jesus in the manger.

Um, except the one with comic actor Eddie Murphy at my local shopping centre.

"What is HE doing in there?" I gasped to my friend Orville.

"Who?" Orville said, leaning down to inspect the display inside the glass cabinet. "All I can see is, er, Mary, Joseph, three wise men and three shepherds."

"There, next to the baby Jesus," I spluttered, pointing to a tiny figure.

"Er, that's a donkey," Orville said.

"It's not just any old donkey," I pointed out. "It's the donkey who played Eddie Murphy in the movie Shrek."

"Don't be silly," said Orville. "He's depicting the donkey who carried Mary to Bethlehem."

I did not argue. I did not want to show Orville up.
I know the donkey in Shrek when I see him. I have seen that film on video with my six-year-old Jack dozens of times. I could almost imagine him guffawing in the baby Jesus's left ear, just like Eddie Murphy.

Orville and I proceeded to the lottery shop where I found out that my ticket had gone up from $2.85 to $3.05.

You would think that the more expensive ticket would come with some kind of guarantee that I would now win a million dollar prize once every couple of years.

But noooooo.

I do not seem to get anything extra for the extra price, just the same old six numbers each square with the same old very slim odds of winning the big one.

No wonder Eddie in the Manger was laughing. He thought I'M the silly ass.

NB: I called this site Dunno because I kept drawing a blank when I had to put a name to it