Humor: Why I have an ironing deficiency

Why I have an ironing deficiency

We have a no-ironing policy in our household.

Well, low ironing policy anyway.

Life is much too busy for us nowadays to waste time ironing, other than on clothes that are really, really, really creased.

And even then, it is my wife Katherine who usually gets out the ironing board.

I am quite happy to go into the world looking crumpled.

Heck, I recently read an article about a fashion designer who charges MORE for crinkled shirts. So if anyone asks me why I look like a slob, I just tell them I am a free-spending fashion plate.

Things were not always like this.

I remember my childhood in the 1960s when our family had designated ironing days (which followed designated washing days).

Everything was ironed, even underwear.

My dad could go off to work in starched white Y-fronts knowing he could withstand anything, even close scrutiny from medical staff should be have an accident.

With a mother and three sisters in a much more chauvinistic era, I did not actually get to do my ironing until I left home.

It was just great setting up house solo.

I could stay up as late as I wanted, eat whatever I wanted, sleep as long as I wanted and iron whatever I wanted.

I quickly decided that I would not iron my underpants.

I decided this somewhere between working out how to unfold the ironing board that first time and heating water in the steam iron to make a cup of coffee (the kettle was broken and I pride myself on my ability to improvise).

I had a long bachelorhood and I minimised my ironing workload as the years went on.

By the time I got married, I was ironing only business shirts.

I know this will come as a surprise to many workmates who thought that even before I got married I had a no-ironing policy.

But I did try with the shirts. Honestly.

It is just they are soooooooo damn hard to iron with all those arms and collars and buttons and cuffs.
If ironing were an Olympic sport you would get extra points for shirts and the higher degree of difficulty they present.

I am very lucky at the moment I have a job which does not require me to wear business shirts and ties.
Thank goodness for that. I think ties are one of the silliest inventions of man. Even the hole in Y-fronts has a purpose but what can you say in defence of ties aside from them being a good back-up if you forgot to pack a handkerchief.

So most of the time I wear T-shirts and unironed open neck shirts to work.

The thing I miss most about not ironing is really, really, really funny tasting coffee.

NB: I called this site Dunno because I kept drawing a blank when I had to put a name to it