Agricultural shows invoke a jumble of memories for me. These include showbags, sideshow alley, the smell of animal poo, dagwood dogs and fairy floss.
These are in no particular order. It is almost as if my memories have been mixed up and shaken up on the hirdy-girdy.
I have not been to a show for four years but I have a feeling that I might have to go this year.
The Royal Canberra Show in my neck of the woods is on from February 27 to 29, and I have a son, Jack, who is seven going on eight.
I suspect, from my own experiences, that his schoolyard will soon be abuzz with talk about the best showbags to get and the coolest rides to go on. Consequently, I think I will have a better chance of resisting the G-forces on a showground ride than resisting the pressure I will come under to take him to the show.
I understand. I remember that great feeling of schoolboy anticipation. Um, I do not remember it all that well (hey, my childhood was in the 60s and no one remembers much from then, even kids) but some recollections do stick in the back of my mind.
I suspect that some of the world's great researchers cut their teeth on finding out just what was going to be in which showbags and whether they presented real value for money.
In my day, kids had to wait until a few days before the show to scour through the showbag catalogues bundled with their newspaper.
These days, though, they can turn to the Internet to research important information like that well in advance. Great invention the Internet. And to think it once was available only to scientists and military people who probably had no interest in the vital statistics of showbags.
When I last went to the Canberra Show, in 2000, I had never seen so many varieties of showbags.
There was everything from Tweety's Big Bag, Lots of Licorice, Wicked Warheads, Ninja Warrior to My Pony Pal, which came, or so the advertisement said, with one cuddly pony worth $6. I doubt though it was real.
My favourite was something billed as the Mega Sumo Showbag. It came with enough snacks to turn just about anyone into a sumo wrestler PLUS a whoopee cushion PLUS a sumo plaque PLUS a sumo money box.
The trick, I think, was to buy two sumo bags and then you would have two sumo money boxes, shaped just like ridgy-didge sumo wrestlers. If you put them face to face, you could watch them go at it, doing pretty much what real live sumo wrestlers do: not much at all.
I have no idea what will be available this year. I do think bags with a John Howard mask and fridge magnet would be a big talking point.
Having had a bit of an issue with my coronary health this past year, I think I will pass on the showbags with confectionery in them. You just never know who you will bump into in sideshow alley. It could be your cardiologist disguised in a John Howard mask.
Ditto with the dagwood dogs.
I have never, ever been to a show and not woofed down a dagwood dog or three so this year will be a real test for me.
Guess I will just have to be happy with the smell of them. And Jack's excitement. And animal poo etc.
©January 27, 2004, John Martin. All Rights Reserved
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